God is with US!

I'm at a point in my life where I want to just throw my hands up to the heavens and yell at the top of my lungs, "Hey God, it's me Karsten.  Are you up there?"  My life is filled with many question marks, discerning moments, deep and fervent prayer.  I am on an emotional roller coaster, happy - sad, excited, overjoyed, overwhelmed and yes, STRESSED (I promise I'm not bipolar).  In discerning what I believe that God is leading me into ordained ministry in his church, my eyes have been opened and my mind has been enlightened to all the possibilities that God has for me.  Some of which may include relocating, other professional ventures, further graduate study, and the list goes on and on.

In addition to my own mental and spiritual tug of war, both my professional and spiritual leaders are leaving their posts.  2012 will prove to be an interesting year, as my parish will begin the search for new rector.  I am taking the news of my rector's call to St. Margaret's Church in Washington, DC a bit more personally than I anticipated.   Besides being an awesome preacher and pulpiteer, she is a great sister in the Lord and Reverend Mother.  My priest, the Reverend Kimberly D. Lucas, was one of the first faces of color that I saw and could identify within the Episcopal Church.  Now the Vestry and search committee, with the assistance of the diocesan staff, are charged with the task of calling a new rector to our parish.  I've never been at a church in which the pastor leaves or is called to another congregation, and I've never been on the governing body, that will oversee the calling of our new rector.  The thought of this is both daunting and exciting to me.

On the professional front.  My Head of School or Principal in other school circles announced last year that she would be retiring to her native Texas to be with her family.  She has led our school for twelve years.  Through the years of plenty and now in the overly stressed economy, which is our reality.  The Board of Trustees and Search Committee for the HOS have diligently narrowed the pool of candidates to three, all of whom have been on campus for interviews with various constituencies of the school.  I have met all three candidates, and am equally impressed with all of them.  Currently the major questions that both saintly institutions of my life (St. Ambrose Church and St. Mary's School) face are.  What now?  What next?  Where do we go from here?

In church today, my pastor, rector, priest, mother in the gospel and sister in Christ formally faced her congregation and told us that she has been called to another church and that she has accepted that call.  Most of us have been through change and know that it can be exciting, hopeful and difficult.  Reverend Kym reminded us today that God is with us.  At first I thought this was a pre-Advent sermon.  But Reverend Kym told us that "God is with us, both when we're confident and when we're most confused.  God is doing everything possible to save us, not only from the wicked schemes of this world, but from ourselves.  What God has for us is infinitely better, even if we can't see it."  As I contemplated what will be one of my rector's final sermons as rector and priest-in-charge of St. Ambrose Church, the words to a very familiar hymn from my childhood rang ever so clear. 

Time is filled with swift transition,
Naught of earth unmoved can stand.
Build your hopes on things eternal,
Hold to God's unchanging hand.

I know that some how, God has everything worked out.  As my sister-in-law reminded me earlier today, that this is a part of the Master's plan.  In response to my opening question, I can hear God saying "Be still and know that I am God."

Peace,
Karsten